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Sunday, June 29, 2008
We all have great days and we all have those days where waking up on the wrong side of the bed is an understatement. Despite how much planning we do to make sure things go smoothly, we begin to ask if there was ever a point in planning to begin with. If you find yourself in the depth of the bad 24. Then it's important to know that you can change the way you look at those hours and virtually transform your life.
Some call it "looking on the brighter side." I call it "channeling." See, if you begin to channel your frustration and focus on something else with that much intensity your rain can turn into sunshine. No, it's not going to change what happened but it can change what you do in the future. What you've learned about the situation and how you can better prepare yourself for success.
Though we may have an "a", "b", or "c" to our plan, there is no way of predicting "d." Let's say your running late for work and you've just entered morning traffic. Rats! Your not going to change the fact that your late but you can either use that time obsessing over how much traffic there is, or educating yourself on possible routes to take should you find yourself running late again.
Or if you've missed a deadline. Your not going to change the fact that your time has passed. But you can better manage your time in the future so that you can make sure you are well within the time frame.
Of course, there are other situations we find ourselves in that are not so easy turn away from and do require time and energy to fix. Those situations are better spent deciding the best way to seek support and the best way to transition our lives so that our finances and emotional structures don't become unstable.
Whichever season life decides blow into your life, know that your next move can always be a smarter one.
Friday, June 27, 2008
When someone hurts you, it's not easy thing to let it go. As a matter of fact, it's hard not to think about what that person did to or not to bring it up in a heated discussion. We seem to judge others based on their actions and once a level of trust has been broken, often times, it's almost never quite the same afterward. But even if you have to change to perspective of the relationship and the type of closeness you want to define with someone, grudges will only hurt you in the long run.
You may never look at that particular person the same again but somehow that person can spoil someone else's chances of doing good in your life. Ever saw someone who looked exactly like the person who wronged you? You probably wouldn't even think of becoming friends with that person. You would probably do everything to avoid them. Even someone with the same name? How about the same zodiac sign? Are you getting my point? Once someone takes us on a bad ride, we don't get off and get on another ride; we get off and never return back to the carnival.
If there is someone in your family, or from a past relationship, or even from a past friendship that hurt you, it's time to finally let it go. You may be able to reconcile it with the person or you may not want to. The point is to finally be free of it. The person that have wronged you could be out there having the time of their life not even thinking about you, and here you are still venting over something that you can't erase.
You may not be able to do anything about the past but you can change the future. You can choose to let this go and finally move on with your life. Sure it will be hard and it may take additional support to help you release everything you've been holding on to. But you have to start somewhere and sometime. Why not start from the beginning, right now. Allowing it to fester will only make it worse.
How do you know you've truly forgiven someone? When you can look at them and not feel hurt or anger. When you hear their voice, and not feel an ounce of hostility. When you can look them in their eyes and not even think about what they've done to you. Have you forgotten it? Heavens no! But you've let it go. And letting it go means not allowing any emotion that stemmed from it, to creep back in and have a place in your heart. Forgiveness takes time but you have to be willing to get it out. Remember, being free does come with a heavy price but it's worth every penny.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
As humans, there are a lot of things that make us different from one another. Still there are many things that make us alike. We all experience things that bring an array of the emotions we all feel one time or another. We get happy, sad, angry and scared. It's been said that that the experiences are more of a learning tool for life and life's profound challenges. Though instead of moving on and letting go of them, we keep a band aid on it as a reminder to never again open ourselves up in the way that we have.
Sure there are some decisions that common sense will clearly give way to the answer. However, should you let a bad experience keep you bound for other possibilities in the future? We've all been hurt, let down, and wrongly judged. Does that mean you should never trust again; or love another soul?
If you've gotten in a pit, don't live there. Decide how to get out and the best way not to fall again. You've got dreams that are undiscovered, should you let money or education stop you from getting there?
Whatever it is that you are holding on to, it's time to let it go. Life is too short for you to spend it in bitterness rejecting yourself and what you can offer the world. In a world full of chaos we can all join together to create the world around us amazing one at a time.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
We often try to define ourselves by the standards the media set on what is beautiful and what isn't. It's so easy to get caught up in someone else's fantasy on what one should look like and dress like that we end up hating everything that makes us genuine. We begin by wanting to change our names and then our bodies, ultimatly, desiring to create a view pleasing to all those around us.
"Be who you are. Express yourself," some say. Though are you really being who you are? Comparing yourself to the looks of the rich and famous is unhealthy to your self esteem. While there is nothing wrong with admiring the looks of those you adore, in order to be happy with who you are, you must learn to love yourself the way you are.
This is not to say that if there is something you want to change about yourself, you shouldn't. Though the key is changing because you want to and not because you want to win the approval of others. People's influence devalues us in so many ways. From compliments someone's looks to the body language displayed towards one we find attractve etc. We let this play into our own opinion of ourself. Being liked and accepted makes us feel good even if we have no intention on getting close to anyone. Compliments still keep us buzzing. But soon, so many of these factors play into our self worth that before we approve anything about ourselves, we need someone else's opinion first. That may not be bad but sometimes depending on these opinions, we make changes we feel are necessary to fit in.
It's time to finally start opening up our minds and examining who we really are. Take yourself for instance; unmask yourself. What makes you tick? What makes you happy? And what makes you beautiful? Once you've answered those questions then your ready for the real question. Do you love who you are? If your answer to that is no, then your missing out. No one can make you love you. But it would be a shame to go through life getting to know everyone else and allowing your best gift, so close pushed so far.
If you don't know who you are, it's time to start. You'll find that despite what the world brings your way, you can love yourself and be yourself through anything.
